✨EMOTIONAL SUPPORT SHRIMP KEYCHAIN✨

A Shramp a Day Keeps the Breakdown Away

Oh hai. Is me. Shramp. Small. Fuzzy. Full of disproportionately large emotional insight for creature shaped like a pink comma.

Hate life? SHRAMP IT.
Existential dread? SHRAMP IT.
Unreplied texts, unfulfilled dreams, and a suspicious mole? SHRAMP. IT.

I am your pocket-sized crustacean therapist with a heart the size of a meatball. But plush. And pink. And probably better at listening than your last three exes combined.

Clip me to your keys, your bag, your last shred of hope. Feel the dark ennui of a morning commute dissolve as I softly whisper in your soul-voice, “We can do this. I believe in you. Also... we should get snacks.”

💼 Boring meeting? SHRAMP IT. I'll make strategic eye contact with your trauma.
🛻 Stuck in traffic again? SHRAMP IT. I navigate emotional congestion better than Google Maps.
💔 Staring into the abyss of unmet childhood needs? Babe. Shramp. It. I came pre-programmed with generational empathy and a tiny embroidered bow.

I am not just a keychain. I am a symbol. A talisman. A tiny stitched scream into the void that also happens to match your aesthetic.

Buy me. Hold me. Let me sit with your pain. Together, we are unstoppable.
Together, we are... SHRAMP.

Small. Soft. Severe emotional support.
100% polyester*. 0% judgment.